I have been running into a little bit of a dilemma lately. I am afraid my girlfriend can physically kick my ass. She took on a part time job as a ranch hand and has spent a lot of time chucking hay bails. Meanwhile, my frumpy ass sits in a chair and presses buttons. Her arms have been getting bigger and bigger, and now a game of "slap and tickle" turns into a domestic dispute. In short, I feel like the guy in the following internet gem.

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